As you can see, at my age – 48 – Art is still one big experiment. ~ E. J. Hughes

The above quote is so appropriate for me, it is easily something I would and do say. I love to play with new things, try them all out, and experiment in so many ways. In the past couple of months, I have been experimenting with at least 2 new mediums.

Spurred on by demo videos on the R&F site, I asked for, and was given for my birthday, a whole bunch of the R&F oil paint sticks. They are wonderfully, terribly messy to work with, so naturally, I love them!

I don't have a lot of pieces to show which have been completed with these, as I have found them to take a very long time to dry. I have a number of half done pieces, while I wait for things to be dry, so I can move on to the next part of the paintings. 

Since I normally paint on canvas when I use oil, I usually find that the paint will dry in about 3-7 days. I switched over to Ampersands Gessobord when I went with the R&F paint sticks though, and have found that some take a couple of weeks or more to dry. I am not sure if this is because all oils take longer to dry on the Gessobord, or if it is due to the nature of the paint sticks.

What I do love about them is how immediate they are. They really lend themselves to gesture type marks and movements. Very spontaneous, they feel a lot like play when I work with them, and I find I am less tempted to get into fine detail, so while I can still work figuratively, I paint in a looser manner with them.

In my next blog post, I'll be talking a little about the Encaustic painting that I started in the last couple of months.

In the meantime, have you ever used the R&F paint sticks? If so, have you tried them on regular canvas or board, and what was your experience? 

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a songbird will come. — Chinese proverb

So, what do you do when you have a bunch of leftover paint? I just cannot bring myself to throw it away. I pull out a canvas, or two if it's warranted, and find something else to paint. It's why I always have a bunch of extra canvases on hand. You just never know when there'll be leftovers that need using up. Sometimes, what happens on that canvas is, well, less than spectacular. And, sometimes it has a really nice feeling to it. On occasion, I might even get a spectacular piece.

So, after I finished my round of self portraits, I found myself with two sets of leftovers. The first thing I had was a whole bunch of leftover oil paint. I challenged myself to do a still life, using ONLY the paints on the palette, and further, to use only my palette knife. I am quite pleased with the results. It's loose, but figurative. I managed to stay away form getting too tight with the rendering.

Untitled, 11 x 14, Oil

After that, I still had some leftover paint...it was coming down to the bare bones, but I figured I would have enough to cover a 10 x 10. I like the result of this one as well. There is a certain "je ne sais quois" about it. 

Untitled, 10 x 10, oil

The other leftovers I had, were pistachio shells. I had been munching on them over the course of a week or two while working on those paintings. I was about to throw them away, but the sheer quantity of shells made me think twice. What, I asked myself, can I create with these?

The resulting series of 5 paintings called Pistache Panache was born.

Pistache Panache #1, 6 x 6, acrylic multi-media

Pistache Panache #2, 6 x 6, acrylic multi-media

Pistache Panache #3, 6 x 6, acrylic multi-media

Pistache Panache #4, 6 x 6, acrylic multi-media

Pistache Panache #5, 6 x 6, acrylic multi-media

So, maybe it pays to think green, in more than one way. Not only good for the environment, but also good for my art. How green are you in your art practice? What green things do you do? Write a comment, I'd love to know!

Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter. ~ Oscar Wilde

Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter. ~ Oscar Wilde

Ah, but in this case, I am both the artist as well as the sitter. So, as the current beliefs say, these portraits are even more revealing.

I started out with a self portrait I would never have guessed I would have the courage to do. Or at least, the courage to do and show. I was inspired to bare the reconstructed breast, while it is still in its WIP stage (Work In Progress). I feel it is representative of the fact that both the breast, as well as my life, are works in progress. I bared the breast, but kept my face hidden. I was playing with the idea of being both naked to the world, and yet hidden. A friend helped with the title, Life In Progress, because as she put it, "you are not only a breast".

Life In Progress

12 x 18

Pan Pastel on coloured Strathmore 500 series paper

The next painting was based on a photo that had been taken of me while I was laughing someones joke. I liked it, and thought it would lend itself to being done in oils, impasto style. I used more vibrant colours to give it more punch. I wanted it to be looser in style, and thought it might be good to keep my shirt on for at least one of the self portraits.

Untitled

16 x 20

Oil, Impasto on canvas

The third painting was inspired after the second, but I actually started work on it in between working on the other two. Again, playing with the idea of being both naked and hidden. This time, though the painting is not as revealing, you can see I am naked in the moonlight, and yet still hidden by the mask. I do wish that in the photo, I could capture the details of the glitter that I embedded in the gold and purple details of the mask. In person, these details really "pop" as a result of that glitter.

Moonlight Celebration

16 x 20

Oil on canvas

So, what inspired me to start with self portraits? I entered a contest called "The Power of Self" - an artists contest of self-portraiture. You can see my entries here.  Please, while you are there vote for me, by clicking on the stars at the top of the page. A click on the fifth star is the highest rating, on the fist star, it's the lowest rating.

I am looking forward to your votes - and to putting my shirt back on!

It is a great piece of skill to know how to guide your luck even while waiting for it. ~ Baltasar Gracian

While I have been waiting to hear from the university, I have been keeping myself busy with more exploration, and some other more familiar paths. I dreamt an abstract painting - well, at least I dreamt the main components of it. The size, and basic colours, and the basic look, with one corner of the painting standing out in the dream. How fortuitous that I'd been in the art store, and seen the exact colour I would be needing for this painting. Pthalo Blue is not an easy colour to find in a pouring paint!

Here then, is the series of paintings I did with Ptahlo Blue mixed directly into the plaster. The first of these is the one I dreamt, and the others were more playing with it after I'd done the first. I just love all the tones and shades with Pthalo Blue!

Midnight Splash - 24" x 24" Mixed media acrylic

Untitled for the moment - 16" x 20"

Untitled for the moment - 11" x 14"

Untitled for the moment - 10" x 10"

Untitled for the moment - 12" x 12"

Another thing I have been doing is working with Pan Pastels. After eyeing the set for a year and a half, my partner gifted me with them, and I have enthusiastically embraced them.

6" x 8"

Salkantay - 12" x 18"

Yet another medium that I purchased, and started working with is Scratchbord. These are made with archival quality board and clay, and finally painted with black  india ink, so that when you scratch through, the white clay is exposed underneath. You can then use the coloured india inks to colour in where you have scratched. You can re-scratch after applying colour, and colour again, allowing you to layer the colouring. This medium is reminiscent of etching, and really lends itself to wonderful textures!

The first one I tried was very basic, and allowed me to simply get the feel of the tools on the board.

Purple Aura 5" x 7" Scratchbord and ink

Next up, I wanted to do something much more challenging. Considering I haven't done any animals in any medium (other than one abstract a few months ago), I figured this would do, as far as challenging myself.

5" x 7" Scratchbord and ink

I have also entered a couple of art contests...next week, I'll post some of those entries, and show you the first self portraits I have done in about 28 years!

The world becomes fresh and hopeful and new, when we create. ~ Lynda Lehmann

Sometimes, life gets ahead of me. With all the best intentions, I have not made it back here to blog. Inspired to create, but not to write. Where has it been, my enthusiasm? It's currently residing in the hands of the administrators for OCAD University, where I applied to go back to school, and do my Masters of Fine Art degree.

The application went in near the end of January, and I have been enthusiastically waiting to her back from them. It's about all I can think of. I didn't want to blog until I heard some news about it, but then, I had expected to be called for an interview by now. No such luck, but as ever, I am hopeful. While I wait, I boost my hope and feelings with creating.

This semester, I am taking a class called Anatomy for Artists. Learning and studying the underlying muscles and bone structure is fascinating to me. We spent the first 2 classes drawing the skeleton, and the class after that drawing from a plastic figure that looks like a person who has had his skin peeled off to reveal the musculature. Since then, we have been drawing from life models, and what a joy it has been!

For this class session, we were focusing in on the torso - front and back. The mistake I made in the second drawing: I had only a rough outline of his face by the end of the pose, and tried to go back and complete his face after the class - from memory. Ugh! Wrecked the drawing!

The next class we focused on the hips and legs. I added as much detail of arms or torso as was needed to show his position, but tried to learn from the previous mistake and didn't fill in details of his face without him in front of me

Next, we had a female model. A few shorter poses, before focusing in on the head and face for two poses.

With a different female model in the next session, we then worked on arms, hands and feet.

In between classes, I have been doing a variety of things. I have some new abstracts to post. I also just got a set of Pan Pastels and some Scratchbord, both of which are exciting new mediums to work with. I'll post those results in the next few days.

You can borrow all the flour you want but you have to bake your own bread. ~ unknown

So, it has been a while since I posted. I have been up to my ears in it to say the least! As you know, when last I blogged, I was about to have surgery - a mastectomy with immediate reconstruction using natural tissues. I was up for it, I was mentally prepared to lose the breast, to expect a certain amount of pain, immobility, but I knew I could deal with it. However, I was not prepared for what was to actually follow.

The day after the surgery, a second emergency surgery due to a hematoma that burst inside of me, causing me to lose too much blood, too fast.

The day after that, my partners heart failed, and he ended up in hospital for a total of 3 weeks, being tested every which way, in preparation for having the aortic valve replaced in his heart. He'd known he had a congenital defect in his heart. Doctors said that the stress of what I was going through, pushed him over the edge, and his heart failed. Luckily, he was able to get to the hospital early enough, and they were able to fix it with surgery after multiple tests.

Then just 3 weeks after my second surgery, the doctors said that the skin around the reconstructed breast was failing, and I might need yet another surgery, for skin grafts this time. We were in a wait and see mode. Sure enough, 2 weeks later, they booked the surgery, putting me back into hospital exactly 6 weeks after my fist surgery, for surgery number 3.

Through all of this, I have done my level best to focus on recovery, and to live as normal a life as may be possible. Naturally, I focused in on my painting. I had started a series of paintings before the surgeries that were to be in an exhibit called "Almost Edible". The idea behind the exhibit: evoke a sense of taste, or smell, or texture of food. Make the viewer look at the piece and think, "Mmmmm".

Here is a look at the pieces that were eventually accepted into the exhibit.

Inspired by Lindt

10" x12" Acrylic on canvas

Taste & Sensation

16" x 20" Acrylic on canvas

Champagne Dreams

12" x 16" Acrylic/mixed media on canvas

Brie Nice To Me

10" x 10" Acrylic on canvas

Party Time!

Plastic sculpture, now mounted on gold colored canvas Approximately 10" tall

Cookware Bouquet

Plastic sculpture, approximately 18 inches tall.

Here is a very short video walk around of it:

Food of the Gods

Sculpture: ceramic/mixed media approximately 24 inches tall

Here is a very short video walk around of it:

Lastly, there was another painting that was included in this exhibition, though not originally created for this specific exhibition.

Owed to My Father

11" x 14" Acrylic/mixed media on canvas

These pieces are all still on exhibit at George Brown College, in the Hospitality building, until the end of January, 2011. The paintings are available for sale on my Artfire site, as well as through the exhibit. You can see the original blog post about this piece here.

And, I will resume more regular posting now that I am over the hump, so to speak.

To send light into the darkness of men's hearts - such is the duty of the artist. ~ Schumann

Over the past couple of months, as I have been going through this whole ordeal of being diagnosed with breast cancer, and now approaching my surgery date on November 1st, one of the things that has been repeatedly said to me, is that people are surprised how positive my attitude is.

For the most part, I agree. Once I got over having heard that I have cancer, and got over the thought of losing a breast, the only real option, in my opinion, is to focus on what happens after. I refuse to live my life in misery because of this, and I do have that choice.

Do I have some fears about this? Sure. I am more afraid though of the actual surgery, than I am of dying of cancer. I am not even that afraid of pain after the surgery, though no one likes pain. Pain is temporary, as is the cancer. It's the actual surgery itself that scares me. My grandmother died on the table when I was 17 years old, and even though I know intellectually that they were operating on her heart, whereas they won't be going anywhere near my life dependant systems, I have that fear. Irrational, I know.

Once the surgery is over, I need to move on, and I need to live my life. I have prepared myself as best as I can, finding photos of post operative reconstructive surgeries, and reading about various patients' experiences. I have looked at the scars, I have cried, and then I have told myself that I can do this.

I have previously joked in this blog about how my paintings have had boobs showing up in them. Of course, I have had the surgery very much on my mind. Keeping my sense of humour has helped me keep things in perspective.

Somewhere along the line, when I was doing the found objects projects, I found some of those plastic egg containers that you can put toys or treats inside of, and once again I was thinking boobs.

I started a painting - one that was my way of saying goodbye to my breast. When my teacher saw it, he suggested a different approach, saying I didn't need to be quite so literal. He suggested "lots of feathers". So, I have done the art pieces both ways, because I really wanted to express this the way I originally saw it in my minds eye, but also thought that the other approach was worth trying as well.

Using the egg cups as breasts, but also as symbols of renewal, I gave them golden wings using gold leaf. 

With Golden Wings To Fly

16" x 20" Acrylic and plastic on stretched canvas

Next, I used found feathers from the lakeshore, and the remaining pink egg cups to create another way of saying it.

Thinking Beyond Pink

16" x 20" feathers and plastic on stretched canvas

It has been suggested to me that I should put myself in a place where I can be an example to other women going through this. To help them to have the same positive attitude that I have. I am not sure how I can do that, or even if I am the greatest of examples. I cannot choose their attitude for them. But I hope that maybe my work can show them at least one way of dealing with it. Maybe in this way, I can help send light into the darkness of someones heart, somehow, somewhere.